What I have so far

The weather decided to stay a certain way for once. It’s becoming November and the clouds are finally being seen again. And although the new day could be awakening my eyes are awfully tired and my mind is blank. It’s not helpful to hear my brother and his friend running around the backyard, like army men battling for their lives in Iraq, yelling “Aim, fire!” “Man down,” and shooting their nerf guns. It is loud and noisy and it is hard to even concentrate on a single note from a song. Distractions can be a deadly thing, but the day will turn to night at any minute so I better take advantage of what I have too.

There’s something about today that is making life more than just a word. Maybe because decisions are being made and the conversations about our future are becoming aware to a new audience, such as myself. We are older now and before we know it we won’t be writing about the future but be speaking of the past. Which leads me to think to myself, am I putting my heart into everything I do?

We all need that drive that makes our blood run and sets our heart at peace. Everything else falls into place once we find out what that is. It helps our world make sense because our priorities obtain to the things we love. Nothing is a blur anymore and the day has meaning. It has meaning because you’re in it and you’re giving your all.

We trail off sleeping while our hearts are still dreaming. Do we forget our hearts desire once we’re woken? I believe we do forget what matters to us most and every single day we have the choice to deny it. We push it to the side until we think we’re ready for it, or we lose the hope in accomplishing it at all. I know it’s impossible to do what you love if there’s no fire inside. But if there is a fire, you’re the only one who can release it, or put it out. No rain and no helping hand; you alone must run with it and let the flame exceed.

I know that I am here to write and give uncontrollable love through it. I feel my passion burning inside me, but as I’ve said, I am the only one who can release it. Most of the time we hide our talent, like women hide their beauty. The truth is, I am not intimidated about writing. I’m intimidated about my viewers. I am afraid of being ignored. Though, when you think about the women from the nineteenth and twentieth century they were banished and always ignored. Now they are finally getting their recognition that they didn’t receive in their time. Did they ever give up though? Did Joan of arc say, “never mind.” No, she said, “It was for this that I was born!” Even with having no response they did what they felt passionate towards. It was no longer someone directing them but their hearts leading the way.